When you travel in Asia you see things that don’t make sense and they either leave you in wonder, or make you laugh. I encountered so many situations like this it’s hard to remember them all, so I went through my Facebook wall posts, and my memory (which is not the best, I’m afraid) and fished some of them out. I hope you guys find them as entertaining as I do.
BANGKOK, Rambuttri, near Kao San Road
I go to get some food from a nearby street stall. I sit down and a short, fat man comes up to me. ‘You wanna ding ding?’ he asks. I go like WHAT??? ‘You wanna ding ding?’ he repeats. I look around. ‘Eh…I think I’ll pass on ding ding, thanks’. Suddenly a lady from a table next to me says ‘I think he means drink, sweetie’. ‘Oh, I’ll have some water then please’…..
BANGKOK, my hostel in Rambuttri, near Kao San Road
The guy next door to me, in my hostel, is having such a great trip (drug wise, not travelling wise). He’s been whispering to himself since 6 am freaking the hell out of me. He’s just said something about two planets coming together, colliding, departing and then….and then he farted. Beaut!
BANGKOK, the same hostel
Every morning I observe the same routine: a Japanese guy from next door gets up and goes to brush his teeth at the sink in the corridor. After a couple of seconds a Thai lady cleaner appears, looking pissed off as hell. ‘You move out today?!’ she shouts at the Japanese. ‘No, not today’ he answers, smiling. ‘When do you move out?!’ she asks. ‘Not sure, maybe tomorrow’ he says. The woman then leaves mumbling something under her breath. I asked him what the deal was and he said that the cleaner lady was his friend. It’s either some kind of strange, Asian friendship, or the woman has some serious issues.
BANGKOK, a different hotel
I arrived in the late evening. The reception staff weren’t there, but I quickly made friends with the security guard, who helped me out with my luggage etc. He was from Cambodia. His English was far from good, but we could communicate somewhat. He asked me tons of questions, including if I was married.
The next day I got up early for my flight. He was still downstairs. He smiled at me and asked ‘Did you sleep alone?’ I know Asians are curious, but bloody hell….!
And there was this that happened to me in Ko Tao.
A hotel in CHIANG MAI
This actually happened to my friend M, but it is so amusing that I really need to post it.
One of the reception staff at the hotel really liked M. He always asked where she was going and what she was up to.
One day she went to the reception desk to get some toilet paper. Her ‘admirer’ was busy serving other customers, so she asked his colleague to give her a roll.
She got back to her room. After few minutes the hotel phone started ringing. She picked it up. ‘Hello…’ she said surprised, as the phone had never rung before. ‘Hi M!’ it was her admirer ‘I just wanted to check….hmmm….how is your toilet paper?’
VIETNAM, hotel in Dien Bien Phu
In the evening we were sitting in the lobby of our hostel, updating our Facebook. The building was as always quiet and deserted. I was enjoying my beer, when suddenly a door next to me opened and a boy of maybe 12 stepped out. He was chubby, short and…completely naked. He started shouting something in the direction of the yard. He closed the door and disappeared. He repeated it every couple of minutes. The situation was so surreal that we couldn’t stop laughing. Tears were streaming down my face and every time the boy appeared another burst of laughter overtook us.